There's More to Life Than Being Happy
EMILY ESFAHANI SMITH JAN 9 2013, 8:06 AM ET
"It is the very pursuit of happiness that thwarts
happiness."
In September 1942, Viktor Frankl, a prominent
Jewish psychiatrist and neurologist in Vienna, was arrested and transported to
a Nazi concentration camp with his wife and parents. Three years later, when his
camp was liberated, most of his family, including his pregnant wife, had
perished -- but he, prisoner number 119104, had lived. In his bestselling 1946
book, Man's Search for Meaning, which he wrote
in nine days about his experiences in the camps, Frankl concluded that the
difference between those who had lived and those who had died came down to one
thing: Meaning, an insight he came to early in life. When he was a high school student, one of his science
teachers declared to the class, "Life is nothing more than a combustion
process, a process of oxidation." Frankl jumped out of his chair and
responded, "Sir, if this is so, then what can be the meaning of
life?"
As he saw in the camps, those who found meaning
even in the most horrendous circumstances were far more resilient to suffering
than those who did not. "Everything can be taken from a man but one
thing," Frankl wrote in Man's Search for Meaning, "the
last of the human freedoms -- to choose one's attitude in any given set of
circumstances, to choose one's own way."
Frankl worked as a therapist in the camps, and
in his book, he gives the example of two suicidal inmates he encountered there.
Like many others in the camps, these two men were hopeless and thought that
there was nothing more to expect from life, nothing to live for. "In both
cases," Frankl writes, "it was a question of getting them to realize
that life was still expecting something from them; something in the future was
expected of them." For one man, it was his young child, who was then
living in a foreign country. For the other, a scientist, it was a series of
books that he needed to finish. Frankl writes:
This uniqueness and singleness which distinguishes each
individual and gives a meaning to his existence has a bearing on creative work
as much as it does on human love. When the impossibility of replacing a person is
realized, it allows the responsibility which a man has for his existence and
its continuance to appear in all its magnitude. A man who becomes conscious of
the responsibility he bears toward a human being who affectionately waits for
him, or to an unfinished work, will never be able to throw away his life. He
knows the "why" for his existence, and will be able to bear almost
any "how."
In 1991, the Library of Congress and
Book-of-the-Month Club listed Man's Search for Meaning asone of the 10 most influential books in
the United States. It has sold millions of copies worldwide. Now, over twenty
years later, the book's ethos -- its emphasis on meaning, the value of
suffering, and responsibility to something greater than the self -- seems to be
at odds with our culture, which is more interested in the pursuit of individual
happiness than in the search for meaning. "To the European," Frankl
wrote, "it is a characteristic of the American culture that, again and
again, one is commanded and ordered to 'be happy.' But happiness cannot be
pursued; it must ensue. One must have a reason to 'be happy.'"
According to Gallup , the happiness
levels of Americans are at a four-year high -- as is, it seems, the number of
best-selling books with the word "happiness" in their titles. At this
writing, Gallup also reports that nearly 60
percent all Americans today feel happy, without a lot of stress or worry. On
the other hand, according to the Center for Disease Control, about 4 out of 10
Americans have not discovered a satisfying life purpose. Forty percent either
do not think their lives have a clear sense of purpose or are neutral about
whether their lives have purpose. Nearly a quarter of Americans feel neutral or
do not have a strong sense of what makes their lives meaningful. Research has
shown that having purpose and meaning in life increases overall well-being and
life satisfaction, improves mental and physical health, enhances resiliency, enhances
self-esteem, and decreases the chances of depression. On top of that, the
single-minded pursuit of happiness is ironically leaving people less happy,
according to recent research. "It is the very pursuit
of happiness," Frankl knew, "that thwarts happiness."
***
This is why some researchers are cautioning
against the pursuit of mere happiness. In a new study, which will be published this year
in a forthcoming issue of the Journal
of Positive Psychology, psychological scientists asked nearly
400 Americans aged 18 to 78 whether they thought their lives were meaningful
and/or happy. Examining their self-reported attitudes toward meaning, happiness,
and many other variables -- like stress levels, spending patterns, and having
children -- over a month-long period, the researchers found that a meaningful
life and happy life overlap in certain ways, but are ultimately very different.
Leading a happy life, the psychologists found, is associated with being a
"taker" while leading a meaningful life corresponds with being a
"giver."
"Happiness without meaning characterizes a
relatively shallow, self-absorbed or even selfish life, in which things go
well, needs and desire are easily satisfied, and difficult or taxing
entanglements are avoided," the authors write.
How do the happy life and the meaningful life
differ? Happiness, they found, is about feeling good. Specifically, the
researchers found that people who are happy tend to think that life is easy,
they are in good physical health, and they are able to buy the things that they
need and want. While not having enough money decreases how happy and meaningful
you consider your life to be, it has a much greater impact on happiness. The
happy life is also defined by a lack of stress or worry.
Nearly a quarter of
Americans do not have a strong sense of what makes their lives meaningful.
Most importantly from a social perspective, the
pursuit of happiness is associated with selfish behavior -- being, as
mentioned, a "taker" rather than a "giver." The
psychologists give an evolutionary explanation for this: happiness is about
drive reduction. If you have a need or a desire -- like hunger -- you satisfy
it, and that makes you happy. People become happy, in other words, when they
get what they want. Humans, then, are not the only ones who can feel happy.
Animals have needs and drives, too, and when those drives are satisfied,
animals also feel happy, the researchers point out.
"Happy people get a lot of joy from
receiving benefits from others while people leading meaningful lives get a lot
of joy from giving to others," explained Kathleen Vohs, one of the authors
of the study, in a recent presentation at the University of Pennsylvania. In
other words, meaning transcends the self while happiness is all about giving
the self what it wants. People who have high meaning in their lives are more
likely to help others in need. "If anything, pure happiness is linked to
not helping others in need," the researchers, which include Stanford
University's Jennifer Aaker and Emily Garbinsky, write.
What sets human beings apart from animals is not
the pursuit of happiness, which occurs all across the natural world, but the
pursuit of meaning, which is unique to humans, according to Roy Baumeister, the
lead researcher of the study and author, with John Tierney, of the recent book Willpower:
Rediscovering the Greatest Human Strength. Baumeister, a social
psychologists at Florida State University, was
named an ISI highly cited scientific researcher in 2003.
The study participants reported deriving meaning
from giving a part of themselves away to others and making a sacrifice on
behalf of the overall group. In the words of Martin E. P. Seligman, one of the
leading psychological scientists alive today, in the meaningful life "you
use your highest strengths and talents to belong to and serve something you
believe is larger than the self." For instance, having more meaning in
one's life was associated with activities like buying presents for others,
taking care of kids, and arguing. People whose lives have high levels of meaning
often actively seek meaning out even when they know it will come at the expense
of happiness. Because they have invested themselves in something bigger than
themselves, they also worry more and have higher levels of stress and anxiety
in their lives than happy people. Having children, for example, is associated
with the meaningful life and requires self-sacrifice, but it has been famously
associated with low happiness among parents, including the ones in this study.
In fact, according to Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert, research shows that parents are less happy interacting with their children than
they are exercising, eating, and watching television.
"Partly what we do as human beings is to
take care of others and contribute to others. This makes life meaningful but it
does not necessarily make us happy," Baumeister told me in an interview.
Meaning is not only about transcending the self,
but also about transcending the present moment -- which is perhaps the most
important finding of the study, according to the researchers. While happiness
is an emotion felt in the here and now, it ultimately fades away, just as all
emotions do; positive affect and feelings of pleasure are fleeting. The amount
of time people report feeling good or bad correlates with happiness but not at
all with meaning.
Meaning, on the other hand, is enduring. It
connects the past to the present to the future. "Thinking beyond the
present moment, into the past or future, was a sign of the relatively
meaningful but unhappy life," the researchers write. "Happiness is
not generally found in contemplating the past or future." That is, people who
thought more about the present were happier, but people who spent more time
thinking about the future or about past struggles and sufferings felt more
meaning in their lives, though they were less happy.
Having negative events happen to you, the study
found, decreases your happiness but increases the amount of meaning you have in
life. Another study from 2011 confirmed this, finding that people who have
meaning in their lives, in the form of a clearly defined purpose, rate their
satisfaction with life higher even when they were feeling bad than those who
did not have a clearly defined purpose. "If there is meaning in life at
all," Frankl wrote, "then there must be meaning in suffering."
***
Which brings us back to Frankl's life and,
specifically, a decisive experience he had before he was sent to the
concentration camps. It was an incident that emphasizes the difference between
the pursuit of meaning and the pursuit of happiness in life.
In his early adulthood, before he and his family
were taken away to the camps, Frankl had established himself as one of the
leading psychiatrists in Vienna and the world. As a 16-year-old boy, for example,
he struck up a correspondence with Sigmund Freud and one day sent Freud a
two-page paper he had written. Freud, impressed by Frankl's talent, sent the
paper to the International Journal of Psychoanalysis for
publication. "I hope you don't object," Freud wrote the teenager.
While he was in medical school, Frankl
distinguished himself even further. Not only did he establish suicide-prevention centers for teenagers --
a precursor to his work in the camps -- but he was also developing his
signature contribution to the field of clinical psychology: logotherapy, which
is meant to help people overcome depression and achieve well-being by finding
their unique meaning in life. By 1941, his theories had received international
attention and he was working as the chief of neurology at Vienna's Rothschild
Hospital, where he risked his life and career by making false diagnoses of
mentally ill patients so that they would not, per Nazi orders, be euthanized.
That was the same year when he had a decision to
make, a decision that would change his life. With his career on the rise and
the threat of the Nazis looming over him, Frankl had applied for a visa to
America, which he was granted in 1941. By then, the Nazis had already started
rounding up the Jews and taking them away to concentration camps, focusing on
the elderly first. Frankl knew that it would only be time before the Nazis came
to take his parents away. He also knew that once they did, he had a
responsibility to be there with his parents to help them through the trauma of
adjusting to camp life. On the other hand, as a newly married man with his visa
in hand, he was tempted to leave for America and flee to safety, where he could
distinguish himself even further in his field.
As Anna S. Redsand recounts in her biography of Frankl, he
was at a loss for what to do, so he set out for St. Stephan's Cathedral in
Vienna to clear his head. Listening to the organ music, he repeatedly asked
himself, "Should I leave my parents behind?... Should I say goodbye and
leave them to their fate?" Where did his responsibility lie? He was
looking for a "hint from heaven."
When he returned home, he found it. A piece of
marble was lying on the table. His father explained that it was from the rubble
of one of the nearby synagogues that the Nazis had destroyed. The marble
contained the fragment of one of the Ten Commandments -- the one about honoring
your father and your mother. With that, Frankl decided to stay in Vienna and
forgo whatever opportunities for safety and career advancement awaited him in
the United States. He decided to put aside his individual pursuits to serve his
family and, later, other inmates in the camps.
The wisdom that Frankl derived from his
experiences there, in the middle of unimaginable human suffering, is just as
relevant now as it was then: "Being human always points, and is directed,
to something or someone, other than oneself -- be it a meaning to fulfill or
another human being to encounter. The more one forgets himself -- by giving
himself to a cause to serve or another person to love -- the more human he
is."
Baumeister and his colleagues would agree that
the pursuit of meaning is what makes human beings uniquely human. By putting
aside our selfish interests to serve someone or something larger than ourselves
-- by devoting our lives to "giving" rather than "taking"
-- we are not only expressing our fundamental humanity, but are also
acknowledging that that there is more to the good life than the pursuit of
simple happiness.
Comments
Post a Comment